Holiday Struggle

So, my holiday struggle began at the end of October. During this time of year I find myself missing my sister more than usual. The holidays are a hard reminder that she is gone. There are plenty of things in my life that I am thankful for but sometimes the heartache I feel during the holidays is hard to overcome. For me, the holidays are a reminder of what's missing in my life. My emotions during this time of year can be very stressful and sometimes overwhelming. It's a daily struggle to stay positive and be thankful for what I have. Since I don't have the option of skipping the holidays, all I can do is pray for strength.

I Still Wonder

I don't think it will matter how many days, months, or years go by there will always be things that I still wonder about concerning Erica's death.  I still wonder about the circumstances in her life, and I wonder how if  different decisions had been made by the individuals who impacted her life maybe she would still be alive today.  It's long been said that with every action there is a reaction and with every action a consequence.  The thing is sometimes we fall victim to others actions or inaction.  I believe stress was a huge factor in my sister's death.  Some of this stress was brought on by her decisions but a lot of the stress she was under came from others.  This is why I still wonder if others had made different choices would my sister still be here today?