Thursday, March 28, 2013

Done Trying to Rationalize

'peace doves' photo (c) 2011, Cornelia Kopp - license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/Losing a loved one brings about many thoughts and emotions. One problem I've struggled with while Grieving Erica is trying to rationalize her death. It seemed I wanted there to be a logical explanation for the question "why Erica?" I found myself thinking and wondering if things would be different if this, that, or the other wouldn't have happened. There had to be a good reason to take Erica away from her daughter's, family, and friends... right??? That's what I kept trying to figure out, but I'm done trying to rationalize Erica's death. If there was a "good" reason, then it shall not be mine to find. Looking for and trying to rationalize death is a futile quest. I have decided this is an area where my faith in God should be placed. I'm done trying to rationalize, my mind has found peace and I pray my family finds the same. 

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” ~John 16:33


 

2 comments:

  1. Hi Andrea,
    I have somehow stumbled across your blog and have spent the morning reading it. I lost my father a year ago and like you have gone through various stages of grief, disbelief and wondering why we are here, what is our purpose and then like you given up the why and wherefore.

    I wish you well, and hope that your acceptance now helps you to move on. Your sister sounded lovely and had a wonderful caring family. Love to you all. x

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  2. When my dad was taken, I could understand because he was in severe chronic pain and had no quality of life . . .and he was 88 and had lived a long full life. When Mom was taken, I didn't understand. She died at 72, still so much life ahead of her and such a loving, giving soul. We still needed her because she seemed to be the bond that held our family close together. Since her passing, we have all wandered apart. I'm still working on closure about my mom. I know it will come in time. I guess instead of asking "Why me?" I should be asking "Why not me?" Death is a part of the human experience.

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